A little over a month ago I made a retard of myself (you can read all about it here) and ended up losing my wallet on a beer run. Apart from being a really neat memento from Mongolia, it also contained my passport, all government issued IDs, credit cards, ATM cards and about $15.00 cash. Suffice it to say, I was more than a little angry with myself when I had to get a new passport issued to the tune of $120.00. But, I sucked it up, paid the good US government and chalked the whole experience up to the stupidity of youth (you know, I’m not going to be able to use that excuse anymore when I turn 25 in December).
Imagine my surprise then, when I received a phone call from the library on Monday saying that someone had found my wallet and it was waiting for me at the information desk.
I ran out of the house so fast my ass-cheeks were on fire.
[Quick note: When Googling "ass-cheeks on fire" for a funny image to put in your blog, make sure the "adult filter" is on...]
Sure enough, the lost wallet had returned mostly intact (the $15.00 was missing, but I’m going to call that a finders fee) and I was retarded with happiness.
Now if only it was as easy to regain my dignity and maturity…
why do you write about things that have nothing to do with Australia or traveling?
Because my good sir/madam, that’s how I roll.
Why you hatin’?
I KNEW it would be somewhere! It’s been having a grand time at the library – is there a better place?
Yea Verily, indeed. Is the wallet still in good condition? It was a very cool wallet, I remember wanting to steal it many a time. (Like that one time where I said I would “Jack” it from you and you made a comment like my face not liking that idea or some suck foolery… good times)
It was YOU wasn’t it??
That’s right, I flew to Australia on a whim just hoping you were on a beer run and might trip just so and I swooped in with my magical invisibility, super speed, and sonic silence just to snatch your mongolian wallet… I then flew back to Australia a month later to visit the library to “return” the said wallet. Minus $15 no less. Finders fee, I’m sure.
You know what’s doubly ironic? Today while walking home from practice I found a wallet with $300 in it. The guy is going to be here in about 30 minutes to pick it up.
Strange. Very very strange.